Lighthouse
by jessib91
Summary: Matt's little sister Charlotte is the new paramedic at Firehouse 51 following the tragic death of Shay. Charley is still struggling to come to terms with her brother (though not biological) Andy Darden's death. Severide and Charley have a past. They are both rock bottom. Can they stop each other from burning? Can they let go of the past? Or will it turn into something more?
1. Prequel

This story starts at the beginning of season 3. I only own Charley up to know.

The tension at Firehouse 51 was impenetrable. Charlotte could feel it from the car park outside. You could see the still raw pain etched on the faces of the people inside. Charlotte wasn't sure how she would be received. After all this was a fire house still torn apart from the loss of one of their own. She didn't want to step on anyones toes. But nonetheless she stepped out of her black ford, wearing grey Dicker boots, black skinny jeans that skimmed above the ankle, a loose white tee tucked in partially and a pair of black sunnies. She carried a bottle of mineral water into the station with her. As she walked in she saw Matt chatting to Gabriela. Matt looked up when he felt a presence looming.

"Char, what are you doing here?' asked Matt.

"Nice to see you too Matty." she laughed.

"You know I love to see my baby sister." he said as he pulled her in for a hug. She wrapped her arms around him, and squeezed him tight. Glad she was able to still feel him in her arms, as she knew all to well how quick he could be taken from her. She thought back to Matts best friend Andy, she'd thought of him as her brother and it had almost killed her when he was taken from them. They stood like that for a while, before she moved over to hug Gabby.

"Hey Gabs."

"Charley, good to see you." replied Gabby s she gave Charlotte a brief hug.

"If it isn't baby Casey" shouted Hermann, gathering the attention of the others.

"Less of the baby, Chris." chuckled Charlotte. "I have some good news." she looked around to make sure she had everyones attention. "I passed!"

She heard whoops from the guys and matt pulled her into another hug.

"i'm so proud of you Charlotte."

"Thanks Matty." Matt saw the sadness in her face and he knew what she was thinking about.

"Andy would be proud, don't you doubt it." he tilted her chin up "He wouldn't want you to be sad Char."

"Doesnt stop me thinking about him."

He hugged her again.

"So I gather Charlotte has given you the good news." came Boden's voice in the background. "the bad news is you're all going to be seeing a lot more of her. Dawson meet your new partner Paramedic Charlotte Casey."

"Seriously?" asked Gabby, smiling. Boden nodded "Now go get yourself ready for duty Casey"


	2. Broken

Charley would be played by Rosie Huntington-Whitely.

* * *

Charley made her way into the locker room. On her way she stopped in front of the badges of the fallen. She focused on Andy Darden. This was only the second time since his death that she had stepped foot in 51. The first time was the day Leslie Shay had died, she had been on placement and had been on shift with Welch's Crew and she'd heard the commotion. She had that bad feeling deep in the pit of her stomach, almost like it was tied in a knot and she was certain something bad had happened. She knew she had to get to Matthew and Kelly. She had ran out without saying a word. When she had got there and saw them, she could see how broken they all were, their emotions clear to see on their faces, eyes bloodshot and cheeks bright red from the crying. Her eyes found Matty, who was comforting Gabby she was relieved to see that they were physically ok. It was then she started to panic. She couldn't see Severide. Her eyes went wide with fear, pleading with Matt, she was scared to ask. The last time she had it had been Andy.

"He's in his quarters." whispered Matt. She took off in the opposite direction. She had to see he was ok. She burst through the door. He stood up, ready to tell whoever it was to go away, but was shocked to see her. To see Charlotte. He could see how worried she had been.

"Charley…" He tried to say as his emotions took over him. He had used the last of his strength up and his legs just couldn't hold him up, they began to give way and he knew he was going to hit the ground hard. He felt her arms around him, as she lowered them both to the ground. He buried his head into her neck, sobbing hysterically, his whole body shaking in her arms. He had never felt so helpless.

"Shay…" he tried to explain why he was in such a state.

"I know Sev. Shhh. I'm here."

They sat on the floor, holding each other until Kelly's sobs had begun to subside.

"I'm sorry Charley."

"You have nothing to apologise for." She smiled, wiping a stray tear from his check with her index finger.

"Yeah I do. I don't deserve you Loti." she felt a tear in her eyes. Loti was his name for her. He'd aways called her that before.

"Sev, please don't." she pleaded.

"Loti, what i did was unforgivable." he stroked her cheek. She looked down blinking away the tears that were threatening to escape from her eyes. "After Andy, I was a mess. I know its no excuse. I know i hurt you. I just want you to know I really do love you. I always have. I don't think I'll ever stop."

"Kelly…" He stopped her with a kiss. His lips touched hers, she could taste the salt from his tears and the smoke from his skin. It took her a moment to get her head together. She pulled back. "Kelly, you don't get to do this. You don't get to walk back into my life as if nothing happened. You don't get to whisk me off my feet and pick up where we left off. I love you Sev, and i thought you needed time. So I waited. But you never came Sev. I was broken…. you broke me Sev… but Jay.. Jay started to put me back together again."

"I'm such an idiot" Said Kelly through his teeth. "I'm sorry Loti." He said as he walked out the door, leaving her sat on the floor. She wiped her face and left Kelly's quarters.

She drove home to her apartment. She got out of her car and saw Jay get out of his. He walked over to her and pulled her into a hug.

"i've got you Charley." he whispered, kissing her head. He guided her to the door, took her key from her hand and let them both in.

—-

"He'd know exactly what to do." the voice of Chief Boden pulled her from her thoughts.

"I miss him Chief."

"We all do Charlotte, he touched all of our lives, and for as long as we are all here and the people he saved are too, then he will never truly be gone."

Charley nodded and smiled at the Chief before making her way to the locker room and getting changed into her uniform. She made her way down to Gabby and helped her stock the ambo.

Whilst they were checking stock Matt came over.

"Severide's AWOL. Has been all week. I've tried his and Shay's and he's not there. Any idea where he might be?" asked Matt.

"Maybe. Ambo is out of service for the rest of the day right?" replied Charley. Matt nodded.

"Leave it with me. Cover for me with Boden. I'm taking your truck" Charley said as she jumped from the Ambo and grabbed Matt's keys.

—-

Charley drove to Severide's cabin hoping he was there. She saw him outside. She parked Matt's truck and made her way towards Severide.

"We need you back Sev."

"I cant."

"Sev, we need you. I need you. We're all broken and we need you back. We're a family. We cant lose you too."

"You don't understand Loti."

"Well then make me. Talk to me Sev." she took his hand.

"I cant come back. If i come back then it all becomes real. I cant go home without her. I just cant Loti."

"You're stronger than you think."

"I'm not. i cant do it. I cant be there without her."

"Boden said something to me earlier about Andy. He said that Andy would never truly be gone as long as we are here, as long as we remember him, and as long as he is in here" She said as she laid her hand on his heart. "Shay's legacy is that she taught us all to be better. She saved so many lives. She made a difference and we will never forget her. We will get through this, but we cant do it on our own. Please come back."

"OK. I cant go home."

"You can stay with me and Jay or Matt and Gabs. You're are more than welcome."

Severide smiled.

"Thanks Loti. And i'm sorry for that night.

"Dont worry, its forgotten. I'm just glad you're coming back with me." Charley linked arms with him and they walked to Matt's truck and Charley drove them back.


	3. Not Alone

Charley had drove them both to Severide's to pick up some things for Matt's. Kelly had decided he would stay there as he didn't really fancy staying with Charley and Jay. He had hurt Charley bad and the last thing he wanted to be doing was to be living with them and the constant reminder of what he could have had. They had entered Kelly's house. It had felt eerie. Charley had even thought she could hear Shay padding about upstairs. But she knew this to not be the case. Charley had hurried up the stairs to Kelly's room, making sharp work of locating his clothes. She felt a little ache in her heart as she realised there was a reason she knew this room inside out. She'd spent many a night here before andy had died. She made her way to his en suite to pick him out some toiletries. She picked up his toothpaste and closed her eyes. Thinking of the last time she was here.

 _She had been standing in this very spot brushing her teeth, in nothing but a baggy navy tee that belonged to him and her black French panties, when she felt his arms snake around her waist pulling her into his chest. He kissed her neck softly. She turned to face him and stepped onto her tip toes so that their lips could meet. She kissed him softly._

 _"Come back to bed?" He asked through their kiss._

 _"I have to go to work. I can't be late. Later though" she had promised._

 _"I'll be waiting" he had smiled as he kissed her again. Little did they know that there wouldn't be a later._

Charley opened her eyes. She felt another pang in her heart for what had been. She finished the packing and made her way downstairs. She noticed that Kelly was stood staring at the bookcase in the living room as she made her way towards him she was able to spot exactly what he was looking at. Standing up in front of him was a photo of him and shay, he picked it up, rubbing the light covering of dust away so that he could see her face clearly. He felt a lump form in his throat as he realised he'd never see her smile in person again.

Charley took his hand in hers and just stood beside him quietly, as if reassuring him he wasn't alone. It felt like hours had passed when she eventually spoke.

"I know you probably don't feel it right now, but i just want you to know, you aren't alone. We are all here for you. I'm here for you. We are a family and a family helps each other through tough times."

Kelly went to reply but the lump in his throat just wouldn't go, he tried to swallow it but instead it seemed to grow, he couldn't speak so he replied by squeezing her hand. She took the picture from Kelly's hand and stood it back up on the unit.

"Come on lets get you to Matt's" she placed her small hand on his back as if to guide him away.

"Thank you Charlotte"

"Why are you thanking me?"

"Because you're here trying to make me feel better when you are hurting too."

"Shay wasn't my friend like she was yours. We had a few drinks together a few times. And whilst I'm sad she's gone and I will miss her very much, my grief is nothing like yours. You didn't lose your best friend. You lost one of your sisters."

"And 2 years ago you lost one of your brothers. You know exactly how I'm feeling. Will it ever get better"

"Do you want the truth or do you want me to lie?" She asked. "I can lie and say time heals or I can tell you the truth and say it never gets any better. In two years from now you will still feel the pain, it will still be so raw, so raw you could almost swear it only happened yesterday. But you will learn to live with it. Heck it's been 2 years and I'm still learning. The hardest part is seeing people just carry on with their lives. Knowing that your world just stopped turning and yet theirs, theirs just carried on as normal and right now you would give anything to have normal."

Kelly couldn't reply to that. He stiffened next to her and she responded the only way she knew how. She wrapped her arms around his waist and cuddled tightly into him.

She closed her eyes and breathed in his aftershave. She recognised it straight away. It was the Viktor and Rolf one that she always bought him. It felt like home. She pulled away from him.

"lets get you settled at Matt's." She smiled before making her way to the front door, wheeling his suitcase behind her. He followed her out, setting the alarm and locking the door behind them. He put his case into the boot of her car and they both got in and drove to Matt's.

They left the car and whilst Kelly grabbed his case, Charley walked towards the door. Matt opened the door before she even had time to knock.

"How is he?" asked Matt.

"Struggling, as expected, he needs us Matt."

"And we'll be there. 51's a family."

Matt gave Charley a quick hug.

"I've got to head back home. Jay will be waiting. Love you Matty."

"Look after yourself kiddo. Love you too"

"Are you leaving Charley?" asked Kelly.

"Yeah, Jay will be waiting." She gave Kelly a quick cuddle "Baby steps Sev." she felt him nod in agreement.

"sweet dreams Loti"

"Night Sev." They pulled apart. "Night Matt. Tell Gabs I'll see her tomorrow."

"Will do."

She gave one final wave before jumping back into the car and back to the apartment she shared with Jay.

She parked her car up and made her way inside. She unlocked the door and stepped into the hallway. She was greeted by the smell of food. She hadn't even noticed she was hungry. Her tummy grumbled and she made her way to the kitchen. Jay was busy pulling out a dish of his speciality Lasagne.

"Long day?" asked Jay.

"You could say that. Severide went AWOL."

"Did you get it sorted?"

"Yeah, found him at his cabin. Just dropped him at Matt's" she stepped closer to him "Busy for you?" she asked

"Just the usual." He replied as he leaned down to kiss her. She responded to the kiss by getting up on to her tiptoes so she could reach his lips. He wrapped his arms around her pulling her closer. The lasagne soon lay forgotten on the bench as they made their way to the bedroom.


	4. Piece of this

Charley had fallen asleep in Jay's arms pretty much straight away. It was about 2am when she woke up. She carefully disentangled herself from Jay trying her best not to wake him. She grabbed her clothes from the floor and tiptoed into the living room where she got changed. She looked at the lasagne on the bench and she felt guilty. She picked her phone and and keys out off her bag. She was careful to close the door quietly behind her. She made her way to her car and she drove, at first she drove around aimlessly, but then she started to make her way to Matt's. She parked her car outside Matt's and she just sat there looking at the house. She pulled her phone out and unlocked it, finding the number that she wanted. Her finger hovered over it. She threw her phone down on the passenger seat and put her car into gear ready to pull away. She glanced over at her phone again. She was torn.

Eventually she made her decision, she knew it to be the wrong one but she just couldn't help herself. She turned off the engine and she picked up her phone dialling the number without giving herself time to talk herself out of it.

"Charley?" asked the sleepy voice on the other side of the phone. She was silent for a few moments before replying.

"I'm outside" She stuttered.

She heard the beep of the phone being disconnected. She looked down at her screen and saw that he had hung up. It had been a terrible idea coming here.

She saw him come out the house and make his way to the car. She pressed the button to unlock her car and he climbed into the passenger side, and shut the door.

"What's up?" He asked.

"I can't sleep."

"Me either." he replied. She looked at his eyes and she could see the bags underneath. She could smell the Whiskey coming off his breath.

"I'm just constantly on edge thinking something bad is going to happen to you or Matt."

"Hey, we aren't going anywhere Loti." He put his arm around her pulling her to his chest.

"And I'm scared that I'll never feel this way with anyone else."

"How do you mean" he asks, she feels the vibrations from him speaking as she buries her head into his chest.

"The way I feel when I'm with you, when you hold me in your arms. I'm scared I'll never feel like this with anyone but you."

"Loti…" he said slowly as he pulled away. He tilted her chin up with his finger and wiped a tear from her cheek as he moved closer to her. His lips touched hers softly and he slowly kissed her. It quickly grew hungry and desperate as her hands found their way to his jeans and began unbuttoning them. He pulled her onto his lap and began trailing kisses down her neck towards her chest. It was getting hot and steamy in the car.

When suddenly she woke with a start. Jay stirred in the bed beside her and turned to face her. Thank goodness it had been a dream. She'd hate herself if she cheated on him. Jay doesn't deserve to be treat like that. She lay back down beside Jay, with her back to him and felt his arm wrap around her and pull her close. He held her tightly to his chest. She fell into a light sleep but Kelly was never far away from her thoughts.

When she awoke a few hours later Jay was nowhere to be seen. She got up, showered and dressed before making her way to 51. She got out of her car and the first person she saw was Kelly, she blushed thinking about her dream last night.

"I just wanted to say thank you. For what you did for me yesterday."

"Anytime Sev."

She linked his arm as they walked in. Ready for a day of madness. They parted ways in the firehouse as they walked away from each other. She turned back to him before he disappeared.

"Oh and Sev, please stop thanking me. I don't want your thanks that's not why I'm doing this. I'm doing it because no matter where we are in life or who we are with. You will always have a part of this" she said as she lay her hand on her heart. He smiled at her tenderly before she opened the changing room door and disappeared to get changed.


End file.
